The single most defining day in my life, or rest in peace dad.

Yesterday was the day most defining day in my life and yet it passed as though it was just like any other.

I have no idea how it happens but every year for as long as I can remember I only remember it was the anniversary of my dad’s death the day after.

Same thing happened again this year.

Over the years I’ve gotten used to the fact that I don’t have a father anymore but I still miss him (almost) every day. I believe that I have become a totally different person since that day which I wished had never happened, at least not when it did.

As there is still so much unprocessed pain and grief I’m planning to finally find a grieving councilor to see if I s/he can help me tear down the emotional defenses I’ve have started to built up as a fortress around my heart since that day in 1984.

(Abandoned graveyard in Auxais, France. Copyright Grisnoir)

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